I Don't Get Around Much

It's easy to rhyme
Sad and bad
And try and fly
And one syllable words
Like that

But it's harder to find
Something to fit
In a lock
When it just
Isn't meant to
Fit in that lock

You can bash it
Against rocks
Or bend it
With coals so hot
They burn red and white and glow

You can try to twist it
So that the sentence strings together
All nicely
Fits in a box
Like a jigsaw

But the truth is,
That in the end
The key wasn't really made
To fit in that lock
To open that door
To reveal the contents
(Or lack thereof)
Of a room
In a house
Or a building
In a city
In a country
Where there is only
One key
For one lock
To one world
Where there could be
A million keys
For a million locks
Or just one
Or just...
One. 

The Downside

I am having a serious problem.


I cannot think of anything to write. I have lost my creative mojo. I have ceased all communications with the weird and the wonderful.

I have stopped TRYING.

And it's not just with my blog. I've been neglecting work. I have this five-page paper due in a month (sounds not so bad...but it has to be written in Spanish), of which a first draft is due on May 7th (the same day as the Castle finale) and I haven't even finished my research. I'm not even halfway done.

The last time I actually sat down and did the work I was supposed to do was on Thursday. Two Thursdays ago.

I am in a downward spiral.

I need a PURPOSE, a GOAL, a REASON TO KEEP GOING, a....

I need to stop being so dramatic...

But also get some work done.



I just feel like I need some time ALONE. By myself. So I'm not so distracted. If only I had my own place where I could live in sweet solitude. Without so much NOISE. There's so much noise....(looks around frantically)

On the upside, I wrote a lullaby. Which I've always wanted to do.

On the downside, I'm in one of my "I don't care" phases.

On the upside, it's just phase.

On the downside, my grades don't care whether I'm going through a phase or not.

On the downside, I forgot to do my homework for my mother (which is worse than not doing homework for my regular teacher).

And on the downside again, I don't actually remember what that homework was.

An Explanation...

Okay, so I know I said I was deleting my blog and that I would start a new one.....and I did! I really did! It's just that I decided that wasn't the plan anymore. A couple days ago I had somewhat of a creative spasm and decided that I was going to delete both my blogs and start anew. It seemed all great and wonderful and adventurous at the time.

But then it took a turn for the worst.

I blinked my eyes, squinting them so that if my computer screen looked blurry enough, it would look like my blogs were both still there. I racked my brain thinking of new titles, fonts and themes. I wanted my new blog to have a PURPOSE. One sole reason for being PART OF THIS VIRTUAL UNIVERSE.

But alas, I had run aground. My imagination was dry and my creative sense had disappeared into thin air.

So I gave up. And here I am, reverting to my old ways. My old blog. My lovely, old blog.

Irk For Thought, however, I will not be continuing. But Upon My Pages is officially up and running! Again...

The End

I have been spastic with this whole blog debacle. I abandon, then post like crazy, then get tied up between both of my blogs, then change titles and themes and.... and so I have decided (after much thought) to end Upon My Pages and irk for thought/Dreamer Extraordinaire. 

I will be creating a new blog, one where I can start fresh and new!

Thanks, 

Kayla

P.S. I'll leave this post up until 12 noon. 

Well...I...

Recently, I have been getting into fanfiction. If you didn't know already, fanfictions are basically short-ish stories (sometimes even novels!) about already existing fictional characters written by fans of those characters. Such as characters from Harry Potter, from TV shows like Castle, or even from manga and anime. There are some Super Weird Ones, like Hermione and Bellatrix having a romantic relationship, or Beckett falling in love with Castle even though he's the murderer of her mother and also the father of her illegitimate child. Anyways, I have been reading lots of fanfic and I"m even in the process of writing (http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7999058/1) one!! It can get addictive, though I never read the really Super Weird Ones.

I feel like I've already posted about this before. Maybe I should write about something else...

Well, I'm on spring break, seeing my family up in Canada.

And...

I ate a lot of chocolate today.

And I feel like

A third wheel. An extreme third wheel. HELLO WHEEL #1 AND WHEEL #2!!! I'M HERE!! I'M HERE!!!